The recent death of my husband’s grandmother reminded me of an issue that many families have to wrestle with after (and sometimes before) the passing of a senior loved one: what do we do with all their stuff?  Forget what’s in or out of the will – a person’s estate encompasses much more than the house, yacht, or other large possessions. I suspect that the majority of last wills and testaments do not include minute details like “sister Mary gets my favorite cashmere sweater and a set of dish towels” or “cousin Joseph gets my dress slacks and shoes.” But for anyone that has lost a loved one – especially a senior who has accumulated knick-knacks, clothing, dishes and other miscellaneous items for 70, 80, or 90+ years – figuring out what to do with these material possessions is a very difficult task.

Although many of today’s seniors have downsized into a smaller apartment or assisted living unit before their passing, they and their families are still charged with the task of “trash, sell, keep” (ever watch TLC’s Clean Sweep?) both prior to and after their death. This trying task is complicated by a number of factors; deadlines and family dynamics are likely the top two here.

In the case of my husband’s grandmother, the family had a limited amount of time to remove her belongings from the assisted living unit where she lived in order that they would not be charged for another month of rent. In some cases, facilities may have a waiting list and perhaps cannot be as flexible in terms of giving the family some time to sort things out. If the senior is still living and is moving from their home of 60 years to a retirement community, there is still the challenge of time. And besides, it’s likely that even with all the time in the world, downsizing is an enormously daunting task.

Quite possibly, a deadline is helpful in moving that huge process forward… although it adds a layer of stress to be sure, not to mention the fact that in the case of a death, loved ones are still absorbing the shock of the passing and entering the various stages of grief as they are forced to sort through Mother’s belongings. This is not a process for the faint of heart.

And that lovely thing known as family dynamics – the thing which causes brother #1 to argue with sister #4 about who gets Dad’s car… or who threw out Mom’s doilies without asking me first… or why does granddaughter B get the antique dresser?  Many sticky situations ensue, especially if brother #1 and sister #4 have a long history of arguing with each other, or if granddaughter B has long been pegged as the “favorite.” I’m sure many of you have examples of your own and can attest to the extreme tensions that can arise among family members during this time.

So do your homework. Ask your senior loved one what he would like to do with all his “stuff” if there aren’t clear and complete instructions in the will already. Perhaps bring in an impartial third party to help sort things through. Talk to your family members and keep the lines of communication open. Sometimes, clear and honest discussion could prevent these fights from occurring, if families are able to share what they want or don’t want. Find out what seemingly insignificant items may have extraordinary meaning to certain family members before charging ahead with the trash bags. It might not always be the valuable antique desk that the children fight over.

You may want to consider working with a Senior Move Manager to help with the downsizing and relocating process for your loved one. For more information, visit http://www.nasmm.org/.

For a great overview on estate planning, visit http://www.abanet.org/rpte/public/home.html.

SFL followers, can you share any resources for our readers that have been helpful to you?

-Michelle Seitzer

This guest blog post is contributed by Boomerater, a free online resource for Baby Boomers helping you find everything from financial planners to vacation packages. Seniors for Living contributes its properties to Boomerater’s retirement living directory.

A new Q&A discussion from Boomerater’s forums appears here each Friday. In this week’s post, members share their experiences about caring for a relative with dementia.

Question:
My father, who lives with us, was just recently diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease. We don’t know how to plan for his care or what we can expect as his condition worsens. We have heard horror stories from friends who have had relatives with this devastating disease. Where do we start?

Reply #1 fromMichelle Seitzer, SFL blogger:
Receiving a diagnosis of Alzheimer’s or a related dementia for your loved one can be devastating. The second biggest challenge? Adapting your home to best care for the needs of your loved one overwhelms many caregivers after leaving the doctor’s office.

Here’s the good news: there is a wealth of information and resources out there that are easily accessible. That being said, what you need to remember above all is that flexibility is the key to success. No matter how many books you read or checklists you follow, your loved one’s care needs will change, or his needs might be so unique that you must create alternative solutions other than those suggested. Buying an expensive, high tech gadget to assist your loved one with daily tasks may not always be the best option — in fact, the gadget itself could present more hazard than help. Alzheimer’s does not fit in a box, so any resources you consult may have to be adapted to fit your care recipient’s unique situation.

Caregivers must begin to look at the home in a brand new light. What hazards exist that could be easily removed? What environmental features should be brought in to foster independence while maintaining safety? And, perhaps the most complicated question is, simply, where does one begin?

An understanding of the changes that can affect the person with dementia is helpful to provide a firm foundation. According to the Alzheimer’s Association, there are five key changes that will occur throughout the disease process:

• Judgment: forgetting how to use household appliances, etc.
• Sense of time and place: getting lost on one’s own street; being unable to recognize or find areas in the home
• Behavior: the care recipient will become easily confused, suspicious or fearful
• Physical ability: the person with dementia may have trouble with balance; depending upon a walker or wheelchair to get around
• Senses: changes in vision, hearing, sensitivity to temperatures or depth perception

Clearly, these changes underscore the importance of flexibility. Some persons with dementia may experience all of these changes at once, others may never have a change in behavior, but may have a drastic drop in physical ability. Some may only experience moderate changes in these areas but these changes may occur over a longer period of time. There is no timeline for these transformations, making the challenge of adapting the home all the more difficult.

Before diving in to the seemingly endless stack of literature or ordering a plethora of items from suppliers of creative home aids like The Alzheimer’s Store, caregivers must recognize the crucial need for respite. If the caregiver is not aware of his own needs or pushes those needs aside, both the caregiver and the care recipient will be at risk. Caregiver burnout is often unseen, but it is all too common. It won’t matter how many non-skid rugs are placed or how many door alarms are installed if the caregiver is not able to meet the care recipient’s needs. In many cases, the caregiver may have health needs of her own and could also benefit from a safer, more streamlined environment.

Keep a positive outlook as you adjust your home. Remember, it is still your castle, but making certain adjustments for the care recipient may even make the lives of other household members easier, too. Involve all members of the family in this process. Children, grandchildren, or other inhabitants may offer valuable insights that might otherwise go unnoticed. It will also ensure that when their help is needed (and it certainly will be needed), all household members have been included in the decision-making process and are part of the action plan.

Reply #2:

With the economy the way it is, more families are caring for Alzheimer stricken loved ones at home. With the monthly cost for an Alzheimer facility running $5,000 to $10,000 each month, there often is no other option. Now is the time to develop a plan for his care while he can still participate. Things to consider:

• Financial aspects: Get all his financial and legal documents together, including: his will, medical and durable powers of attorney, deeds, mortgage papers, bank accounts, pension and other retirement documents, life insurance and health insurance policies, social security info, stock and bond certificates and any documentation about his monthly and outstanding bills.
• Resources to tap: Even though the costs can be high, there are several resources you can turn to including Medicare, disability insurance, long-term care insurance, life insurance, Social Security Disability Income, Supplemental Security Income and Medicaid. The Alzheimer’s Association website alz.org discusses these different financial resources, as well as just about everything else you need to know as a caregiver for a patient with Alzheimer’s.
• Tax Deductions: This site also lists a number of deductions caregivers take for medical/nursing care, transportation, home modifications, etc.

Add your comments or find out what others had to say about caring for a relative with Alzheimer’s on Boomerater.com.

It’s time to fall into autumn with our September 22, 2009 edition of Boomers and Seniors – News You Can Use. The chillier weather makes this season the time of year when you just want to snuggle up and stay inside. But there’s a harvest of opportunities to enjoy, even when it’s brisk out there! Read on for great resources about staying active and informed this fall. And, if it’s inspiration you seek as the days get a bit gloomy, look no further than this recent SeniorsforLiving.com post about Dr. Joseph Kirsner. He just celebrated his 100th birthday in a very unique way. Find out here!

A few months back, I highlighted a fascinating social experiment – Steve Gurney, the founder and publisher of “Guide to Retirement Living SourceBook,” wanted to enhance his 20 years of experience in the senior living world by taking things a step further: he moved in. For one week, Steve completely immersed himself in the world of the Paul Spring Retirement Community, an independent and assisted living community in Alexandria, VA. His experiences extended much further than the one-week snapshot, learning much about the entire process both prior to and long after his stay. He writes,

“I wanted the primary focus of my move to be fully experiencing the feelings and emotions that one goes through in making the transition from a home they are familiar with, to one that is unfamiliar. In an effort to immerse myself in the experience I would not have contact with my family, work or have a car in the parking lot.”

Get an overview of Steve’s first project.

Now, Steve has taken an even bigger step: he’s moving back in, this time bringing his six-year-old son along for the ride.  Enter Asa Gurney, giving his perspective on aging on this You Tube video:

Asa and Steve moved in to the Residences at Thomas Circle on August 19th. You can read about their adventures at Steve’s blog – Everyone is Aging. Steve’s wife Bonnie and three-year-old daughter Ashley visited Asa and Steve for Sunday brunch, one of the most popular family events at senior living communities. Steve writes, “It was fun watching Asa tour them around the community that he now was familiar with and telling the stories of what he had done.” Three-year-old Ashley convinced her parents that she must stay with Asa and Steve for the remaining two days of their stay, so I’m sure the blog entries to follow her arrival will be quite entertaining.

Stay tuned for a future post that examines some of the themes/lessons that Steve will no doubt learn after this stage of the project: there are sure to be a host of observations unique to this project as opposed to the first move-in on his own. I’m also curious to hear what Asa and Ashley have to say about their stay. You can always count on kids to give the straight scoop.

Keep up the good work, Steve – there is no better teacher than experience, right?

P.S. Also check out this recently published New York Times article for a similar experiment: medical students at the University of New England who are interested in geriatric medicine are staying at nursing homes for two week stints – and they are given a diagnosis (or two) to “live with” during that time.   Talk about hands-on learning!

- Michelle Seitzer

I was a young adult when my maternal grandmother was in a nursing home and I remember my mother bickering with her at times for various reasons. During those times, I remember thinking, “Wow, I thought people outgrew that.”

When it was my turn to take care of my mother a few years ago, I learned about the stress, and yes, frustration firsthand. I was a bit caught up in my own anxiety when I was taking her to the doctor one day for breathing problems related to lung cancer, and I’m not sure what exactly I was doing at the time, but she said, “Will you quit? I’m not going to die right this minute!” That’s when it dawned on me that even though I was an adult and she was ill, we could still aggravate each other.

In fact, there’s a study that shows that adult children and aging parents do get on each other’s nerves, and that parents may be more bothered by the tensions:

The researchers asked about tensions related to a variety of topics, including personality differences, past relationship problems, children’s finances, housekeeping habits, lifestyles, and how often they contacted each other.

Parents and adult children in the same families had different perceptions of tension intensity, with parents generally reporting more intense tensions than children did particularly regarding issues having to do with the children’s lifestyle or behavior (finances, housekeeping).

(For the study, supported by a grant from the National Institutes of Health, Birditt and colleagues at Purdue and Pennsylvania State universities analyzed data on 474 parents and adult children who were at least 22 years old. The adult children lived within 50 miles of their parents. African Americans made up one-third of the sample and the rest were European Americans.)

The study goes on to explain that tensions may even get worse as the child ages:

…parental perceptions of tension increased with the adult children’s age, particularly about topics having to do with how they interact (e.g., personality differences). “Middle-aged children may be less invested in the parent-child tie than young adult children because they’re more likely to have formed their own families and experience multiple role demands.

Of course, tensions in the family may be related to several factors, but it’s a good reminder to look at it from a parent’s point of view. They may not be enjoying some of these things any more than you do, especially when it comes to matters of their increasing dependence.

-Elizabeth Thielke

How do you handle such situations?

Many assisted living facilities offer respite care, a valuable service for family caregivers. In fact, you can search for respite providers here on SeniorsforLiving.

Merriam-Webster describes respite as “an interval of rest or relief.” These intervals can vary in length, purpose and location. Sometimes, a family member needs major surgery and cannot care for his loved one during the three-week recovery period. Maybe a spouse who has been caring for her husband with Alzheimer’s needs a break as she feels her patience wearing thin. Maybe an elderly parent who lives with his children & grandchildren doesn’t want to join the family on their summer trip to Disney – but cannot stay home alone. Respite stays are flexible and can be tailored to meet each unique situation; services can be provided in home or at a facility.

It is crucial that caregivers take care of themselves – no matter what their age or what level of care they provide. Caregiver burnout is all too common; feelings of guilt often prevent these dedicated people from setting aside their duties and allowing themselves “down time” in order to continue providing quality care.

To maximize the respite experience, some advanced planning is necessary. Of course, making arrangements is part of that – reserving a room at a local facility or coordinating companions to come into the home – but the caregiver needs to think about her own needs too. What would be the most relaxing or enjoyable way to spend the time off? For some, the best way to recharge is talking/socializing with friends or family. Others need time alone. Cleaning the house might not be the best way to relax, but for those who take comfort in order, it might be a productive task.

An extensive article on HelpGuide.org offers “Respite 101” for families, including a great list on how to make a routine of rest and rejuvenation.

Remembering the benefits and following these six tips can ease the process:

• Plan and schedule frequent breaks. Respite is not just a service – it is an outcome that requires regular relief.
• Use checklists to teach providers about your care recipient’s schedules, likes and dislikes.  Offer suggestions for handling behaviors.
• Make back-up plans. Always keep a list of alternate providers and resources.  Unplanned emergencies should not prevent you from taking care of yourself.
• Evaluate often. Observe your care recipient before and after respite sessions.  Ask for brief updates and more detailed reports regularly.
• Expect changes. Respite care is a process that often requires fine-tuning, Anticipating and accepting changes in personnel or programs can keep you from becoming discouraged.
• Attend your support group regularly. Structured and informal groups allow you to meet others in situations much like yours. You can talk, vent, laugh, and exchange tips with people who understand. If you can’t easily leave home, online communities, message boards and forums can provide much-needed support.

If someone you love is in need of respite care but is overwhelmed about taking that first step, offer assistance. Use the search functions here on Seniors for Living. Share articles like the one on HelpGuide.org, or from other respected sites such as the Family Caregiver Alliance or the National Family Caregivers Association. So many resources are available, but a caregiver that is nearing burnout likely will need gentle encouragement and a strong sense of direction to overcome/outweigh those feelings of guilt. And, hopefully, after that first afternoon off, it will become easier to turn that afternoon into a weekend away… and finally work up to that full week of rest.

- Michelle Seitzer

“In an aging population, no one knows what they are going to face. But we all know that as we grow older, we can’t do what we used to do.” – Rick Watson

A few weeks ago, I had the distinct pleasure of speaking with Rick Watson. Rick is the Vice President of Italbec US, one of the world leaders in high-end natural stone and design. His current projects are the W Hotel in South Beach and Four Seasons Palm Beach.

While that’s Watson’s day job, his passion is “aging in place” design. “I’m on a mission to improve education about what’s needed, taking the stigma out of preparing your home for getting older, and teaching consumers how to make aging in place beautiful and practical,” he explains. “It’s so much a passion that I almost forget it’s a business. It’s more like what life is about and what we do every day is a part of that.”

An architect who has worked in interior design for the past 20+ years, Watson’s love of improving “aging in place” design originated with a unique project in Israel. A client approached him with a request to design a facility for the 55+ community. His assignment: The facility should meet the needs of residents ages 55 and up, whatever and whenever those needs may be, and no matter how that aging process might look. Watson eagerly accepted the challenge; he wanted to understand design and aging from a different perspective.

He knew how important it was for the facility to be attractive without having an institutional feel. Furthermore, the facility had to be safe, convenient, and helpful to an aging population (who will, as mentioned above, have varying needs at varying times during their stay). Of course, typically, “safe, convenient and helpful” design had been unattractive, he thought. Think about hospital design –- sterile and functional perhaps, but not exactly warm and inviting. So the challenge for Watson was this: creating a facility that looked like a Ritz-Carlton with all the necessities for aging gracefully, i.e. lighting, grab bars, and non-slip surfaces.

There were two key highlights to this project, he says. First, the facility towered above a shopping mall and was also attached to the largest hospital in Tel Aviv. If residents have health issues, there is a clinic on site, along with assisted living, skilled nursing, and hospice services.

Second, with safety being of the utmost importance in Israel, that was another important consideration in building and designing an aging-friendly community there. Within 20-30 yards of the facility, you could be safe from any type of violent attacks, but the facility still looked like a high-end hotel with marble floors, rugs, chandeliers, and more. This type of design is rather unusual in Israel as most buildings are designed in a contemporary, old-World style, he says.

The project in Israel was an enormous success. After returning to the U.S., Watson duplicated the process in Fort Lauderdale (minus the attached shopping center and hospital). This led he and his business partner Jill (a certified Aging-in-Place specialist) to begin to look at all the ways to address an “aging in place” population.

They quickly realized they had to start with terminology. “Aging in place” has somewhat of a negative connotation, he points out, and it doesn’t truly apply because “everyone is aging in place.” The team decided to make it the positive experience it really is. “We founded our endeavors on making that a reality. We’re all going to age…why not make it enjoyable and entertaining?”

To do that successfully, it’s all about creating a conversation, says Watson. “It’s like anticipating a vacation. The anticipation is magnificent, but the actual vacation sometimes doesn’t work out so well. Most of us are both excited and afraid about aging, which creates a real opportunity for the conversation to take place.”

For Watson, “aging in place” design is personal. His mother will be 84 this year. She has lived alone for 23 of those years and has always been independent and healthy -– and thankfully, she still is. But let’s go back to the opening quote for a moment: as we age, there are things that we just cannot do the way we did at say 10 or 20. So when Watson’s mother had a fall, the siblings expressed the inevitable: “Oh no, what should we do” to which Watson supplied a hearty “She’s fine!” Rick says she was most upset because she couldn’t get her hair fixed for a week or so during the recovery.

Clearly, Rick’s mission for the education and execution of “aging in place” design is rooted in his personal experiences and understanding of the aging process as a natural part of life. His work is shaped by this goal: Since we are all aging in place, let’s make this experience something positive, not detrimental. Let’s make living alone both safe and functional for those who have various (and often unpredictable) needs as they age, and let’s address that beautifully, with architecture and with interior design.

I couldn’t agree more.

- Michelle Seitzer

How have you modified your home for an aging parent or to meet your changing health needs? Share your story here!

How many young professionals are aware of Alzheimer’s and want to do something about it?  It’s typically not one of the “sexier” causes. But while many 20-somethings are thinking about pursuing an advanced degree, the next stop on the career path, or perhaps getting ready to move out of Mom and Dad’s basement, there are a growing number of young professionals interested in raising awareness of Alzheimer’s disease and related dementias.

One such group is the Alzheimer’s Association’s NYC Chapter Junior Committee whose members are concerned about this  disease affecting their parents, grandparents, or other loved ones — and they are making a difference, New York City style.

The Committee is dedicated to raising awareness of Alzheimer’s and related dementias to individuals in their 20’s and 30’s through events, support, and education to further the efforts of the NYC Chapter. A few members of this cutting-edge group shared their thoughts: how and why they got involved, and how it has benefited them. I’m sure that you will be inspired by their stories, too!

Scott Chabina is the Events Chair, and he was inspired to take action by witnessing his grandfather’s struggle with the disease:

My grandfather, William J. Chabina, suffered from Alzheimer’s disease and passed away when I was still very young.  Unfortunately, the few memories I do have of my grandfather from my childhood are of a very different person than the loving, intelligent, and caring father and husband that the rest of my family had the pleasure of knowing.  Sadly, this realization was lost on me during my childhood and it was not until I grew older that I was able to realize just how large of an impact this disease had on my family.

The fact that I will never have the opportunity to get to know my grandfather as the person he truly was and the impact this disease continues to have on my family inspired me to get involved with the Alzheimer’s Association.  I know that my involvement with the Association is something that would have made my grandfather extremely proud, which inspires me to do anything I can to raise additional funds for Alzheimer’s research and awareness of this terrible disease.

Aimee Adler is a committee member who joined the committee following her grandmother’s recent diagnosis:

I have always been really excited about volunteering and doing charity work within my community.  My grandmother was recently diagnosed with early-onset Alzheimer’s Disease. Not really knowing anything about the disease, I talked to friends and family about it. One friend suggested I join the ALZ NYC JC as she was already a member. My grandmother inspired me my whole life to do good for others. The involvement I have in this group was inspired by her as well.

Meghann McKale is the Junior Committee’s President. She shares her inspiration for leading the cause:

I learned about the Junior Committee when I participated in the Memory Walk in 2002. My roommate at the time worked for Eisai, who had a team, and she invited me because she knew my grandmother had Alzheimer’s. When I saw the group’s table, I knew it would be a great way for me to channel my frustration at not being able to take care of my grandmother, who lived in Rhode Island.

Aimee, Scott, and Meghann have found tremendous value and personal benefit in working for the Committee and partnering with the Alzheimer’s Association:

Scott: The real benefit of being involved with the Junior Committee is that you can have a direct impact on helping those who suffer from Alzheimer’s disease by raising funds for research and community outreach programs that help people who truly need assistance.  Additionally, the Junior Committee focuses specifically on a younger demographic (20 to 40 years old) that, unfortunately, will ultimately become affected by this disease in some capacity or another. It has been absolutely shocking to me to see how this disease has affected so many people my age and how it has similarly affected their relationships with family members and loved ones.

Aimee: While discussing potential ways to raise money for research and programs dedicated to helping people with the disease is an amazing benefit in of itself, the group has taught me more about Alzheimer’s and has inspired me to really become more involved by volunteering to speak about the disease to groups, help out with events, get more people involved and build awareness.

Meghann: One of the hardest things about dealing with a family member having Alzheimer’s disease is the feeling of helplessness. Being proactive is one of the few things that really combats that feeling. Plus, there’s the added benefit of working with like-minded people, who share the same passion for the cause and who have been through the same difficulties.

Serving on the Committee has also been instrumental in helping both Scott, Aimee, and Meghann cope with the impact of Alzheimer’s on their families. They explain:

Scott: In working with the Junior Committee, I have been able to see that other people my age have had similar strains on their families and have lost loved ones to this tragic disease.  As I learned more about Alzheimer’s disease I came to understand just how difficult it must have been for my grandmother, Margaret Chabina, to go through this disease with her husband.  When she called me to tell me how proud she was I was involved with the Association and how important it was to her, I knew that I was doing something important and that hopefully, there would be something positive to come from my experience with Alzheimer’s disease.

Aimee: Being involved with the Junior Committee (Since October 2008) has really opened my eyes to the disease and helped me learn how to cope with a family member who has Alzheimer’s. By meeting once a month with other people my age (ages 20- 30), the group has also taught me how to react to family members or to help my grandmother get through this.  I now talk to friends about it and learned that some of them have lost family members to this disease.  Joining this committee has also sparked conversations within my family and has opened communication pathways to talk about how we can help together as a family!

Meghann: Working with the Junior Committee has allowed me to feel that I’m making an impact. Though I lost my grandmother to the disease in May 2007, I have to believe that my small contribution may make a difference in whether or not it happens to future generations – not just of my family but everyone. Knowing that there are other young people who are actively working towards the Alzheimer’s Association’s vision of a world without Alzheimer’s is quite inspiring. While I often find myself alone among my peers when it comes to my passion for working with people affected by Alzheimer’s, I know that a striking number of people in all age groups are touched by this disease – and I would venture to say that all of those people are passionate about finding a cure.

*  *  *

Scott, Aimee, and Meghann are hard at work planning for the 7th Annual Collective Consciousness Benefit, coming up on Thursday, May 7, from 8-11 p.m., which will take place at the trendy, celebrity hotspot Tenjune in Manhattan, NY.  Funds raised will go directly to Alzheimer research and to support programs and services offered by the New York City Chapter.  Elizabeth Hasselback from ABC’s “The View” has been named Honorary Chair, and DJ Berrie will provide music that is sure to keep guests on the dance floor.  A silent auction featuring a variety of high-end items from a number of top-name retailers, jewelers, restaurants, and hotels is sure to attract many bidders.

To purchase tickets for the Collective Consciousness Benefit, or to purchase a bouquet for the event in honor of a loved one, visit http://www.alznycjc.org/. The site will also connect you to other events sponsored by the Junior Committee and more information about the group’s efforts (including details on monthly meetings).

So why not be proactive?  Educate yourself on the basics and let friends and family know about the resources available. Attend an event like the Collective Consciousness Benefit or the annual Memory Walk in your part of the world. And join with the members of the Alzheimer’s Association in realizing their vision: a world without Alzheimer’s. We may not see that world in our lifetime, but future generations will thank you. Act now!

- Michelle Seitzer

Talking to your aging parents or loved ones about finances is often a tough thing to do, but having these issues in order is one of the most important things you can do. Since my mother died a couple of years ago, I always remind people of the importance of planning in case of your illness or death, but there’s still plenty I don’t quite understand.

The term “estate planning” is still kind of nebulous to me and sounds like something people with lot of money and assets have to worry about, but indeed, us regular people need to plan, too. Though I’m not an expert (consider this information rather than legal advice), these are four important financial planning topics to consider:

1. Make a will - A basic will is a written account of who you want to inherit your property and names a guardian for young children if you have any. It also names your executor, the person with authority to make sure that your wishes are carried out. It’s never too early to make a will, but it’s very important to keep it up to date as well.

2. Write your health care directives - Health care directives consist of a living will and a power of attorney for health care, both important documents if you become unable to make medical decisions for yourself. A living will is a written statement that names the type of care you want (or don’t want) if you become incapacitated and a health care power of attorney names someone you trust to make decisions if you can’t.

Make sure your loved ones know where these documents are located and keep copies available since many hospitals routinely ask for them on admission.

3. Name a financial power of attorney – A financial power of attorney names a trusted person to make financial decisions if you are unable to handle your own affairs. In some instances, the court will appoint someone for you if your documents aren’t in place, so it’s wise to properly name the person of your choice.

4. Complete beneficiary forms - make sure all bank and insurance accounts have the beneficiary forms filled out and updated. In some instances, account benefits that are payable upon death may keep the recipient from having the funds go through the probate process.

While it’s never pleasant to plan for your own death, not having a will or other planning documents may mean that the courts distribute your property according to state laws. An estate plan will also put your mind at ease since proper planning is a huge burden off your family during (it was for me when my mother died) an already stressful time.

There are many resources such as Nolo.com to help you gather information about estate planning, but your should always consult your lawyer or other legal adviser to find out what’s right for you.