Seniors For Living

As the only daughter, you have a great relationship with your Mom. Maybe you’re the son who lives nearby and have taken on the role as primary caregiver for Dad. Sometimes, the relationship between a parent and child is strained, but in other cases, it’s the dissenting opinions of siblings that muddy the waters when it comes to making decisions about senior care.

If that seems to describe the dynamics in your family, don’t worry. Reaching a consensus about what’s best for Mom, Dad, or another senior relative may be tougher when more people are involved, but it is possible to come out of it still speaking to one another.

Consider these tips for building unity while making a decision or transition:

1. Remember, it’s about your parent, aunt or grandparent: Put aside (or better yet, deal with in a separate conversation) any longstanding differences with a sibling so you can focus on the person who needs care.
2. Let a professional that you all trust handle the finances: Money is such a thorny issue, and probably the root of many disagreements.
3. If assisted living seems to be the best option, make sure everyone has a chance to visit the community in person before deciding yes. For those siblings who live out of town, ask that they at least call to ask questions or get a sense of what the community is like.

Your turn: What tips would you add? Did you and your siblings work as a team, or have massive disagreements?