“But she won’t remember I was there. She doesn’t recognize me, and it makes me sad. She won’t remember that I called, won’t know my name on a birthday card.” These are among the reasons that people do not visit or stay in contact after a transition to Alzheimer’s care, besides the guilt and mixed emotions leading up to and associated with the move.
However, it is impossible to know that the person with Alzheimer’s doesn’t recognize you or remember you were there. She may not be able to recall your name, but she knows your face. He may not remember what day you came to see him, but he knew you were there and it meant the world to him.
Whatever the reason for the decision, and no matter what stage of Alzheimer’s the individual is in, the transition will be hard for everyone, especially for the person who has moved to a new place. Your loved one will need your support during the adjustment period, and visiting or calling regularly will accomplish that.
Don’t let your guilt or sadness keep you from being there for your family member or friend. As much as you can, set your own difficult feelings aside and make it a priority to be a recognizable face or presence in a place of uncertainty.
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